Posts tagged ‘Stress’

Less Load Love

I love my wife, and my family, and clan.

When extra pain enters our world an extra weight falls upon me. I care.

Today two things were given to me. The first I know and just needed a reminder, “Casting all your care upon God Who cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7) is a decision and an action.

The second thing is that I love my family, but no matter how deep and wide that love is, it cannot compare to the love which Jesus has for each of those in my love bubble. The love I express falls short, and so in order to love them as much as they deserve, I have to love with God’s love, not my limited human love. It is human arrogance that says I will love and that will help. It simply adds a load, however if I let God’s Spirit love through me, it not only is bigger love, but Jesus is bearing some of the load for love and lightens my own weight and allows me to focus more on The One Who Is Love and less on my caring and, often, inability to cause a positive result with the ones around me.

Human love resides primarily in emotions. If I let God love I can care more deeply, more effectively act for the loved one, and not be drained by emotions that are usually magnified by seeing the pain and not having a ready fix.

At this moment I need this lesson to be carved on my soul. It is the only way to get through.

This Week

It has been a week unlike any other.

Saturday my only brother died suddenly of a massive stroke.

On Monday into Tuesday morning we traveled the 10-hour round trip to the funeral home.

Only hours after we got home I was called to the hospital where our very good friend had spent hours very sick and they were sending her home. They were overwhelmed there in the Emergency Room with so many patients that she was not fully treated.

I stayed with her for 8 hours before having to call the ambulance again to return her to the hospital for overnight.

Wednesday I again drove her home, and even though it seemed they had treated her as needed this time I stayed for a few hours to be sure.

Thursday I made a list for 5 people and went shopping. (We do that, so that when we go to a store we can reduce the need for others to go to the same store, during these pandemic restrictions.) That meant delivering to 3 others right away both in town and out.

Friday, by the grace of God, I recorded a video of the chapel service which, since the pandemic, I have done weekly for the retirement residence where my Mother-in-law lives.

This is the stolen tree

Friday afternoon someone came up on the front porch and stole the light tree which my brother had given to my Mother this past Christmas. The police would not take a report because such minor incidents are to be reported using their online system. I did get it completed.

Then I posted the theft on social media hoping someone might know something. It was shared well over 150 times. Someone, a complete stranger, offered to replace it! (Alas, it cannot be replaced because it was a seasonal item and is no longer in stock.)

So here I sit at 11:30am on Saturday, exhausted, processing my grief, shocked by the emotional impact of the theft, drained from making the chapel video, drinking my third big mug of coffee.

In my spirit I am finding a peace that passes human understanding, but my body feels like it has been run over, stepped on and robbed blind.

I know we are not the only family stressed out like this. I am not asking for pity. I am saying if you can identify be assured we are praying for everyone who feels like they could be the one who wrote this.

But for you I repeat what I wrote to our dear friend in Africa, “God is our Rock and Salvation”.