I joined Jesus when I was about 8 years old. Since then I never doubted my salvation. But…

My religious upbringing was Baptist. I learned to memorize Scripture, I read the Bible like one eats good food as modelled by them, and found a heart to care for those lost in sin. But…

The emphasis was always on salvation. Careful teaching about maturing in faith, handling doubt and dealing with embarrassing sins were not part of my experience with them. Testimonies always related to God answering prayer, healing, finding lost keys and unshakeable walking with Jesus. But…

18245801prayinghumilityAs a very young teenager I did not find God so cooperative. Indeed, I recall a time when I prayed at night in my bed and I had a most distinct experience that my prayers never even reached the ceiling, much less heaven. It caused severe distress. But…

Years later I learned, though never taught, that prayers to Jesus don’t go to heaven for a hearing. Jesus is within, Paraclete is right alongside, God holds me in the palm of divine hands. Expecting my prayers to soar was wrong-headed; God knew them before I spoke and handled them right where I was.

God has answered every prayer I prayed. As I have described here, though, I often didn’t get it. I was so busy expecting God to act the way I was told God acts that I didn’t notice God acting on my needs!

Sometimes God said “No” because my prayer was for my own convenience, to avoid discomfort, or call an end to a lesson before I learned the lesson.

And, yes, God has actually said “Yes, but not now”. When I grasped that I did work at being patient, though if we think of Jesus as the Great Physician I was not really very good at being a patient sometimes. At other times I suddenly realized why the wait because the final result made sense.

More times than I can count I prayed like King David of old:

“O Lord, I call to you.

O my rock, do not turn a deaf ear to me.

If you remain silent,

I will be like those who go into the pit” (Psalm 28:1 God’s Word©).

I really did that. Yet when I take a moment to be logical, why would God turn a deaf ear? Well, it seems like that when I tune out God’s voice, when God’s plan requires a delayed response, when I completely miss God at work.

Funny thing, that is not God being deaf – it’s me!

More often than not I should be dumb so I won’t be deaf while God brings life to my prayers. Anything else is really the pits. But…