Too often culture, more than discernment through The Spirit, determines how Jesus followers follow Jesus.

For example, most believers know that Paul wrote, “Wives submit to your husbands.” Some even know it also says, “Husbands love your wives.” The outcome of this tidbit of information is the religious teaching that the husband is the boss, and wives can become, in actual practice, little more than unpaid servants.

I observe that the words to wives are found in 5:22-24, 33b. The words to husbands last longer, verses 25-33a.

What is more important is that the function of marriage, husband and wife, is a living metaphor for Christ and the Church (mentioned 5 times!). If anyone simply takes these words as a sociology of the family they stand rebuked by the very passage of Scripture they seek to use to justify injustice. The conduct of the wife (not women in general) is a witness to how Followers of The Way should walk humbly. The conduct of the husbands is a witness to the unsurpassed love and sacrifice of Jesus Christ for humanity, to love mercy. Together these proclaim the testimony to God’s love for mercy (all this being what we read in Micah 6:8).

In other words, despite the cultural impulse to the contrary, these words are not about gender, but about God, who made marriage as a witness to the intimacy of the Creator with the creation.

Even further, these words are part of a bigger scheme to walk humbly in which children honour parents, and parents act to avoid provoking children to anger.

Even further yet, Paul goes so far as to say the conduct of slaves and owners who belong to The Way witnesses to the same relationship described by the metaphor. Slaves obey in a humility that calls out how we serve God. Owners are also reminded of humility, for God is their Boss Supreme.

All this is not about family or society, but that Believers are to live and breathe and relate and function in every way at all times to promote the Good News.